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When Sharon discussed with me that she felt led to focus this month on intimacy, I silently
prayed, "Lord, give her another direction!" From a
man's perspective, I tend to think of intimacy as something too personal to
talk about, much less write about. But perhaps that is one of the main
problems we are facing today. We don't allow ourselves to be vulnerable and share
who we are and what we are feeling with even our closest family and
friends.
Many years ago I had a best friend whom I could talk with
about anything. We told each other about the girls we liked, we shared
interests in the activities we did, and we even went on trips together. We
shared hurts from our past, as well as dreams and goals for the future,
with each other. But as the years went by, our focus on intimacy changed
as we each got married. We soon drifted apart, and before I knew it, he
had left his wife, moved away, and became involved for a time in the drug
and alcohol culture. I was emotionally crushed. That was almost
twenty-five years ago. I've never really had another friend that close. I think the
main reason is that I fear allowing myself to be that vulnerable again will
cause me to be hurt once more. Still, I am beginning to understand that
in order to experience real joy, we have to take a chance and open ourselves
up to someone else. I do have a friend that I love to spend time with,
only our work schedules and distance don. t allow that very often.
And I am learning to be intimate with my church family. During a recent
personal crisis, our church family stepped up and met a need without even
being asked; an overwhelming act of love. One of the things I have to work at constantly is intimacy
with my wife. I am learning that it is more than just time together
in bed. It may mean washing a load of clothes when she. s tired,
or looking after the baby so she can get a few hours rest, or going to the
grocery store for her. Or it may be sharing time with our
nineteen-month-old grandson as he dances and entertains us and we laugh
together. No, I'm certainly not the perfect husband, but I do want to
share my love in ways that will mean the most to her. Most importantly, I am learning to be intimate with
Jesus. After all He has done for me, why shouldn't He be my closest
friend? I find when I share my sorrows with Him, He brings me joy. When I
share my pain He brings me comfort. When I share my fears, He gives peace.
He is the lover of my soul, and I know He will never leave me or forsake
me. How is your intimacy level? It's not measured by how much
you give or how much you take, but by how much you share. Did you
catch that yet? Open yourself up to someone today and become an intimate
friend. |
